Discover

As I've been pondering what the past five-going-on-six weeks of my Creativity & Innovation class at Queens University of Charlotte have truly been about and what I've accomplished with this blog, the one word that keeps coming to mind is discovery. As listed in our course syllabus, this blog was part of our "connectivity project." The purpose: to build and track connectivity and idea generation surrounding a topic or project about which you have passion." I'm definitely passionate about writing, so there was no doubt that writing was going to be the theme of this blog. But in reading my very first post, I realize that what I had initially intended this blog to be did not come to fruition. Each week, I intended to explore a different aspect of the professional writing process - from the writing itself to editing and publishing, branding and marketing, even book jacket design. I intended to connect with resources who were experts on these topics and build my community. While I completed much research on all of these aspects of writing professionally and did make some connections, this process became more about self discovery, which is the real step one and an essential step in continuing to move forward and seriously pursue my passion. For me, this has been my "discovery project."

Up until a few weeks ago, I only shared my writing with a very select group of people who are my family and closest friends. My writing style is totally me, but that means it's very authentic, honest and personal, and putting those pieces of me out in the universe for the whole world to read made me feel extremely vulnerable. However, I realize that I have to be willing to expand and share my own world in order to build, connect and grow. The amazing support of my #639create classmates encouraged me to take that first leap (and it was a leap), and I made my personal blog public. Last week, in honor of Father's Day, I wrote a blog about my dad, who tragically passed away in 1995 when I was 20 years old. I have never shared such a personal, tender piece of writing. Usually those writings are reserved for my journal, which is for my eyes only. Interestingly, that blog post has had the most reads of all the blogs I've posted between both this blog and my personal blog, and I believe it's because it is such a reflection of who I am at my core - that's where I connect. I've discovered my true voice and it lives in my heart. I was so comforted by the caring, gentle, kind words from people who read my post and were touched and was incredibly moved by some of the stories people shared with me, either about their memories of my dad or in reminiscing about their fathers.

I have learned more than I could have imagined and more than I can put into words in the past five weeks. I am certain that I am still processing the experiences I have had in Creativity & Innovation and that they will resonate with me for a long, long time. I am discovering and re-discovering myself, yet still searching. I feel grounded, yet free. I am taking in the world and taking on the world. I believe. My wings are fluttering. I'm in the perfect place to create.

What or who has encouraged and inspired you to take a leap?

Summer Reading

reads by the sea by Joseph Robertson (http://www.flickr.com/photos/josephrobertson)

Ahhhh...summer time. I heart you. While I read a ton throughout the year, summer time is my favorite time to read. There is something deeply relaxing about reading a book while sitting on the shores of an ocean under my big Tiffany blue beach umbrella, wearing my oversized sunglasses, listening to the sound of the waves gently rolling onto the sand. Hours can pass without me never looking up from the pages of the book I'm immersed in. This is the reason why I have not yet invested in a Kindle or another e-reader. I love the feel of a book in my hands, love turning the pages, love the smell of the paper, love using bookmarks to mark my progress, love seeing a book on my bookshelf and remembering where I was in my life when I first read it. A bookstore is also one of my favorite places, so I'm happy to stay behind in the technology when it comes to books and reading them.

I believe I have a diverse reading list. I'm always willing to read books that are recommended to me even if at first glance I'm not so certain I will connect with the story. Some of the best books I've read are not from the best seller's list, but from the "new authors" section. In my research on advice for aspiring writers, the "best advice" I have encountered over and over and over is to read, read, read and write every day. This advice is all the more reason to expand my reading list this summer and experience new authors and their different voices and styles of writing with a heightened awareness of character development. As I begin to visualize writing my first novel becoming a reality, I need to begin really developing the characters and their personalities. The story could take me anywhere as I begin to write, but the characters need to remain authentic no matter where I take them.

So, I was excited today to stumble upon Oprah's summer reading list: http://www.oprah.com/book-list/Os-2011-Summer-Reading-List. I'm excited to spend a lot of time this weekend in a bookstore stocking up on books for my summer reading. What books are on your summer reading list? Please share your recommendations!

Create Your Own World

As I've started taking my writing more seriously, I have started researching authors who fascinate me. I must admit, I was totally mesmerized and taken by the Twilight series authored by Stephanie Meyer and read the entire series in two weeks. When I first heard of the Twilight stories, I said, "I'm so not into vampires. And Twilight is for tweens." Curiosity got the best of me and I decided to read the first book, Twilight, to see what all the hype was about. Once I started reading, I could not put the book down. I was traveling 100% for my job at the time I began reading the Twilight novels, and I read the pages at every opportunity I had - while standing next to the baggage carousel in the airport in Anytown, USA as I was waiting for my luggage, in the backseat of a taxi, every single night in my hotel room. Some nights I'd even order room service for dinner so I could stay in and read. A book was always in my purse so I had it with me at all times in the event I could steal a moment to read a few more pages. I remember I was on a project in Philadelphia, PA, when I unexpectedly finished Eclipse, the third book in the series. I was so eager to keep reading that I went on a mission in the city to find and purchase a copy of Breaking Dawn, the fourth and final book. The first two bookstores I went to were out of copies and I ended up trekking a few miles in my suit and heels with my laptop backpack in tow until I finally found a bookstore with a copy in stock. I was truly sad when I read the last page of Breaking Dawn, the last book in the series, because this fascinating world I had been so immersed in had come to an end. This is the kind of author I want to be - one who can create a world that is so amazing and fascinating and mesmerizing that readers do not want to leave it. What an incredible connection and gift to a reader, though in the case of the Twilight series, many guys many not appreciate this, as the depth and magnitude of Edward Cullen's love for Bella Swan has dramatically changed the expectations of many girls! :)

In researching Stephanie Meyer, I found the video below from a TIME interview with her. Like J.K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter novels, Stephanie Meyer doesn't seem to have gotten caught up in the frenzy surrounding her books (and now movie franchise and so much more). She seems to have remained grounded. As she states in the interview, she wrote for herself and created her own world, and I think that's one of the talents of being an author. I believe that as soon as you start trying to write for others, you lose yourself. There will always be criticism and people who don't connect with you, but I think that as an author, it's essential that you remain true to who you are, to your voice and to your own world.

What books have you gotten lost in? Which authors do you most connect with or find the most fascinating? Do you appreciate the contrast between fantasy and reality that fiction writing allows or do you prefer authors/books that closely parallel reality?

Everything Happens for a Reason

In addition to my passion for writing, I have a passion for quotes. Perhaps they go hand in hand. While I love a plethora of quotes that are well known, I also believe I have an ear for hearing little nuggets in every day conversations with people, while watching tv shows like Oprah and Gossip Girl (a guilty pleasure), and in unexpected moments, like while eavesdropping on airplanes. I use the Notes application on my iPhone to capture these words and often write many of them on little pieces of paper in a rainbow of Sharpie colors and glue them on my inspiration board. As I was pondering in what direction to take this blog post, I looked up and this gem written in fuschia Sharpie jumped out at me:

“It is impossible to live without failing at something unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all.” ~J.K. Rowling

As you may know, J.K. Rowling is the author of the Harry Potter novels. I remember capturing this quote while watching Oprah’s interview with her at the beginning of Oprah’s final season. I am mesmerized by J.K. Rowling and her brilliant and creative mind. She is an extraordinary author with an incredible gift and a huge celebrity in not only the literary world, but in the entire world, yet so genuine and real. J.K. Rowling has an interesting biography, which you can read in full text here: http://www.jkrowling.com/textonly/en/biography.cfm. I am especially intrigued by the excerpt below:

“After leaving university I worked in London; my longest job was with Amnesty International, the organisation that campaigns against human rights abuses all over the world. But in 1990, my then boyfriend and I decided to move up to Manchester together. It was after a weekend's flat-hunting, when I was travelling back to London on my own on a crowded train, that the idea for Harry Potter simply fell into my head. I had been writing almost continuously since the age of six but I had never been so excited about an idea before. To my immense frustration, I didn't have a functioning pen with me, and I was too shy to ask anybody if I could borrow one. I think, now, that this was probably a good thing, because I simply sat and thought, for four (delayed train) hours, and all the details bubbled up in my brain, and this scrawny, black-haired, bespectacled boy who didn't know he was a wizard became more and more real to me. I think that perhaps if I had had to slow down the ideas so that I could capture them on paper I might have stifled some of them (although sometimes I do wonder, idly, how much of what I imagined on that journey I had forgotten by the time I actually got my hands on a pen).”

Had J.K. Rowling not met her then boyfriend, had she not decided to move to Manchester, had her train not been delayed, had she had a writing utensil, Harry Potter may not exist at all or he may be part of a very different story – one that may not have grown into the franchise it is today, creating magic and wonder in the minds of children and adults alike.

I truly believe that every little thing happens for a reason in order to get us to the next moment and I think life often leads us to unexpected places. I have learned two lessons from reading J.K. Rowling’s story and watching her interview with Oprah:

1. While everyone’s journey is unique and we don’t always understand the reasons why something is happening to us in the moment, we need to be truly present in these moments and open our minds to the possibilities of where we are being led.

2. Our imaginations are also unique and a fascinating part of being a human being. What an amazing gift the ability to imagine is! I believe we all need to let our imaginations play and run free far more often than we do.

As I reflect on my journey to this point, I realize that I am exactly where I am supposed to be in this moment. Every experience has led me to this point, to the MA Comm program at Queen's University of Charlotte, to the #639create class, which has ignited this spark in me to pursue my writing. I don't know where this adventure will lead me, but inspired by J.K. Rowling's personal story as well as her creation of Harry Potter's story, I do know that anything is possible!

When you reflect back on your journey, are you able to make sense of the experiences and moments now as necessary to get you where you are today? What do you imagine? Do you put limits on your imagination or do you let it run wild and free?

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" ~J.K. Rowling, "King's Cross," Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, 2007, spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore

Inspired

Last night, my Creativity and Innovation class (shout out to #639create) met at Area Fifteen in the NODA district of Charlotte (http://areafifteen.com). I had no idea what to expect, as I had not heard of Area Fifteen prior to last night, but nothing could have prepared me for the experience while there. I was absolutely overwhelmed with inspiration. I got lost in the space - not literally, but figuratively speaking. There are such simple needs in this world, such small things we can do to nurture the human spirit, and it's amazing what happens when we open our hearts and our minds to the simple and the small. "The little things? The little moments? They aren't little." ~John Zabat-Zinn

I've been so focused on the topic of writing and the act of writing itself since I declared to the world that writing is my passion. While it's necessary to focus on my dream and my passion and to dig even deeper, I think that sometimes doing so distracts me from the very thing I am trying to focus on. I've felt overwhelmed at times by how much there is to learn. I've felt insecure that my writing won't be good enough to consider being published. I've felt scared that I won't be able to expand my writing beyond my Dear Diary Moments, that when the pressure to write professionally becomes real, I will lose my voice. Last night at Area Fifteen, I learned that it's important for me to also focus on other creative outlets, like painting, for example. Writing has always been my creative outlet, but I realize that the more pressure I feel to produce, the less of an outlet it can become. So, I need additional means with which to nurture my creativity, which will always keep me centered and inspired and create space for my emotions and thoughts, which will eventually spill onto paper and fulfill my writing.

Until last night, I had never painted. When I first heard that we were going to paint, I must admit, I felt nervous. My mind was blank. What could I possibly paint that would be as beautiful as the artwork I had already seen at Area Fifteen? Standing outside at Area Fifteen, surrounded by both blank canvases and amazing artwork, I felt overwhelmed - overwhelmed by possibility. As soon as I was standing in front of my very own canvas with lots of paint brushes and huge jars of paint in a rainbow of colors, I didn't hesitate for a moment. I dipped my brush in pastel turquoise blue paint and scrawled the word "dream" across my clear canvas. Suddenly, I was lost in a whole new world. For the next 30 minutes, the inspiration kept coming in huge waves and suddenly I was dipping my brush in green and blue and pink and white and yellow paint, bringing my vision to life. My mind was calm, content, quiet. It wasn't until I was in Lil Jetta driving home that I realized how much space painting had cleared in my mind - space for my creative dreams to grow, space for my passionate wings to flutter. I started to cry and laugh at the same time, because I felt so free. It was a moment of clarity.

I'm going to Michael's tonight to stock up on canvases, an easel and paint supplies. Writing remains my passion, but painting is a wonderful companion to my writing. I can't wait to discover more creative outlets and new experiences on this journey!

What are your creative outlets or how do you "clear the clutter" in your mind so you can create space for your dreams?

DQ Dear Diary Moments

In my previous post, "Scared," I wrote about my fear of feeling insecure and vulnerable. However, I believe that it's through these emotions that I grow the most. So, after much thought, I have decided to share the link to my personal blog, DQ Dear Diary Moments, http://dqhope.blogspot.com. In this blog, Believe~Create~Grow~Fly, I have began writing about my journey as I pursue my dream of becoming a published writer. But the heart of my writing, my true voice, where I connect on a deeper level with myself, is what you will find in my posts in DQ Dear Diary Moments. Thank you to #639create for providing me with the courage, inspiration and strength to share my true voice with the rest of the world.

Scared

“Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” ~Goethe~

I have a passion for writing. I would write all the live long day if I could, and to be able to do that is the dream I am pursuing. At times, I feel like I am bursting from the inside out with inspiration and love to share through my writing. But until I can earn a living as an author, I have to maintain my current career, which couldn’t be more misaligned with my desire to write. My career is also incredibly demanding and I work in a very fast-paced, high-stress industry - healthcare information technology. Being a driven, full-time career woman and a part-time grad student does not allow for a lot of free time.

Since I created this blog and really began focusing on nurturing my passion, I feel as if I have been challenged and tested by time. I’m the queen of project plans and lists, so creating tasks and time to connect to and focus on writing is always in my plan or on my list. Yet, the more I focus on all things writing related, the more time seems to allude me, because the more I focus on it, the more time I desire to dedicate to it. I then become frustrated and unfocused that my passion never seems to be able to be a priority.

I just recently read a blog post called “Don’t Bother Looking for This” (http://kimandjason.com/blog/2010-10-31/dont-bother-looking-for-this.html) that provided the black and white perspective I needed in just the moment I needed it. I was connected to this blog from SARKS’s Twitter page (@SusanAkaSARK). It was the tweet “You make time for the things that are really important to you. Period.” with the link to this blog that immediately caught my attention. Time is not my enemy; I have been my own enemy by not allowing my passion for writing to be a priority in my life. The really great news is that this is in MY control! The really scary news is that making my passion a priority makes it real, and making it real brings feelings of fear. I fear defeat and failure. Dreams inspire hope and magic and possibility. I fear that my dream of becoming a published writer will be deflated and the hope and magic and possibility will be lost. I’ve made work and school my main priorities in my life because I know I’m good at those things. I haven’t made writing “for real” a priority because it makes me feel insecure and vulnerable. What I need to realize is that when I began my career and when I began grad school, I also felt insecure and vulnerable. What I need to realize is that if I don’t try, failure is my only option. But if I do try, maybe…just maybe…my dream will come true.

What things do you do to escape from life’s demands and responsibilities that allow you time to focus on your dreams? What gives you courage?