“Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least.” ~Goethe~
I have a passion for writing. I would write all the live long day if I could, and to be able to do that is the dream I am pursuing. At times, I feel like I am bursting from the inside out with inspiration and love to share through my writing. But until I can earn a living as an author, I have to maintain my current career, which couldn’t be more misaligned with my desire to write. My career is also incredibly demanding and I work in a very fast-paced, high-stress industry - healthcare information technology. Being a driven, full-time career woman and a part-time grad student does not allow for a lot of free time.
Since I created this blog and really began focusing on nurturing my passion, I feel as if I have been challenged and tested by time. I’m the queen of project plans and lists, so creating tasks and time to connect to and focus on writing is always in my plan or on my list. Yet, the more I focus on all things writing related, the more time seems to allude me, because the more I focus on it, the more time I desire to dedicate to it. I then become frustrated and unfocused that my passion never seems to be able to be a priority.
I just recently read a blog post called “Don’t Bother Looking for This” (http://kimandjason.com/blog/2010-10-31/dont-bother-looking-for-this.html) that provided the black and white perspective I needed in just the moment I needed it. I was connected to this blog from SARKS’s Twitter page (@SusanAkaSARK). It was the tweet “You make time for the things that are really important to you. Period.” with the link to this blog that immediately caught my attention. Time is not my enemy; I have been my own enemy by not allowing my passion for writing to be a priority in my life. The really great news is that this is in MY control! The really scary news is that making my passion a priority makes it real, and making it real brings feelings of fear. I fear defeat and failure. Dreams inspire hope and magic and possibility. I fear that my dream of becoming a published writer will be deflated and the hope and magic and possibility will be lost. I’ve made work and school my main priorities in my life because I know I’m good at those things. I haven’t made writing “for real” a priority because it makes me feel insecure and vulnerable. What I need to realize is that when I began my career and when I began grad school, I also felt insecure and vulnerable. What I need to realize is that if I don’t try, failure is my only option. But if I do try, maybe…just maybe…my dream will come true.
What things do you do to escape from life’s demands and responsibilities that allow you time to focus on your dreams? What gives you courage?
My mentor told me once, "So many people in this world talk about wasting time, the people who live their dreams are the ones that focus on redeeming time". Time is like money, we only get so much of it and how we use it dictates whether or not we will be comfortable or live a life struggling, always trying to catch up. For me, when I get the opportunity to do what I love, time constraints take a back seat to grattitude. Also, whenever I get to witness others exercising their passion(s), I am grateful for the privilege to share in their joy. Keep on keeping on and the time constraint will take care of itself. Love the way you write.
ReplyDeleteKenyon - you are an angel! Your inspiring, motivating and wise words lift my wings. I love the quote about wasting time vs. redeeming time - instant perspective. You're right - when we focus on the things that matter most, everything else in life seems to fall into place. Thank you for your continued support!
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